The game – gather round, gather round.
‘Never mix religion and politics’ said the vicar to the nun, which was nice. ‘Just pass the spliff, it’s your turn to move, this game has gone on for 9 hours now and we’re nearly out of cannabis’ whispered the nun in return. ‘Oh, I hadn’t realised we’d smoked so much’ said the vicar through a thick haze of smoke, ‘have some tokes on this and let’s play on’.
‘That could be a blessing in disguise’ replied the nun, landing on Saudi Arabia for the second time in an hour. Handing over her stash she took a large toke on the spliff and smiled.
‘Ah, if a picture paints a thousand words then you’re a surrealists wet dream’ said the vicar, taking the spliff from the nun and offering it to the priest sitting next to him. ‘Cheers’ said the priest, ‘but to be honest I’m pretty fucked’.
‘Honesty is not something often associated with us lot really now is it’ giggled the nun as she winked at the priest.
‘Speak for yourself’ said the Rasta, pulling out another large bag of cannabis he’d brought along for the game. ‘I’m here for tokes, jokes and to hang with you folks so get rolling’
That really set the jedi and the pagan off. ‘No beating around the bush with you man’ said the jedi’ we’re here to toke and that’s what we’re going to do’. ‘And no more ‘we’re nearly out of cannabis’ from you vicar, we’ve enough here to blast all of our gods, or non-gods, or small galactic free spirits near Ganymede…………
‘Or yoda’ said the jedi, collapsing in a heap at his own comment and coming up for air and a toke soon after.
‘Who’s for munchies’ said the Englishman.
‘Not for me’ said the Irishman’ I’m sorted’
‘Same here’ said the Scotsman, putting the finishing touches to his spliff. ‘This baby is packed with cannabis, is designed with the game in mind so let’s get toking’.
‘Does it always get this messy?’ croaked the wide mouthed frog.
‘I’m afraid so’ replied the horse with a long face.’ ‘The last time we played Aunty Mabel got her left tit caught in the mangle and we had to call the barman’.
‘What did you call him? asked the wide mouthed frog.
‘Bernard’ said the horse, ‘he likes it formal when he’s asked for help with mangle work’.
Attention turned back to the game as the vicar rolled the die and got four.
‘Wheezy chest vicar, it’s a wheezy chest’ said the doctor. ‘You finally join the mile high club. Next time you resolve to have someone with you! Fly to Rio de Janeiro, Brazil’.
The vicar could hardly contain himself. He’d got as far as France and that card meant he’d be wasted before he got there again. Well, more wasted.
‘Permission to dribble and giggle alot’ said the doctor as he watched the vicar move back to Rio.’ And you’re supposed to be a wizard! Hasn’t worked his magic to get you back to Greenland has he?’.
‘He’s filling me full of cannabis and chocolate so hat’s off to him’ said the vicar, chin dipping to his chest as his brain registered the likely tokes he’d be making soon.
‘So why so quiet Mr Crab’ said the nun.
‘I’m loving it, just loving it!’ answered The Crab, ‘and of course I’m mashed, as I’m the Mashed Crab’
At that everyone in the room, as one, nodded to The Crab.
‘Aving it, ‘aving it’ said the Scotsman getting a little carried away as the jedi landed on a Chance card.’ What’ll it be?’.
‘If it’s a question that involves a Turbot or Cheddar I’m going under’ said the jedi through a very wide grin. ‘Just in case let’s have an off-piste toker round. I’m sure the game can stand it’.
‘Where’s the frog gone?’ said the horse, drawing heavily on a spliff and looking round the table.
‘I bet he’s in the kitchen, that frog eats like a horse………….no offence’ said the pagan stroking his beard.
‘I’ll see if he’s in there’; said The Crab, ‘and I’ll bring back something for the rest of us. While I’m gone build a few with this cannabis will you’ said The Crab handing over a bag of White Widow to the Irishman.’ I think the game is ready for it’